Those are the words first said to me as I walked into my uncle's house last night. "I know." was my response. During the last class I taught last night, my wife answered the phone and took a message for me to call my dad. After classes were over I called and got the message that my cousin had died of a gunshot wound. We don't know the whole story on how or why, but that is all irrelevant compared to the simple fact that a young woman was alive one morning, and not the next.
As I type this I'm still dealing with the mix of emotions. I looked at my own daughter and had a flash of imagining what it would mean to lose her. I looked again and imagined what it would be like for her to lose her mother.
My wife and I drove out to my uncle's house. I knew there was not anything we could do, but I felt that it might help if I could be there. My uncle was still able to joke between crying. My aunt was more obviously shaken. Their friends were there, their pastor was there, they had support. They will make it through, they will carry on. It will be hard, but nobody ever promised us life was going to be easy.
This is a reminder to me that every, every life should be cherished and respected. There are some who have no love for others because their skin is too dark, or too light. There are some who can't seem to love someone because they are too religious or not religious enough. There are those of us who just can't seem to get over the differences between us and others. All of us at one time or another, find some person that for some reason we just can't like.
My father said to me once when I was young and very angry with my sister, "God doesn't tell you that you have to like your sister." I was shocked. Then he said, "But you do have to love her."
I challenge you my ten tigers teammates, and anyone else who finds these words. Find that person that for some reason irritates you. Whether you have good reasons to dislike them, no reasons to dislike them, or some reason that you just haven't figured out, find a way to love them. Because that person you work with, or train with, or commute with, should be cherished and respected. That person is someone's mommy or daddy, son or daughter, brother or sister, and someday they will die and they will be missed.
I accept the challenge.
ReplyDeleteA powerful and deeply sad lesson. I was ten when I lost my father. I, too, accept your challenge and will work toward setting aside my ego and finding the value in all people. (A wise woman once told me that, often, when we don't like someone, it's only our own ego in the way ...)
ReplyDeleteI also accept the challenge (although it feels more like a heart-felt plea). I am very sorry for your loss and the loss to your family. I think we as humans tend to look past the simple things when we try to understand the complexities of another human being. In the search for an all-encompassing explanation of the character of another we overlook the most profound things, which happen to be simple. When I was younger, My mother and I had an argument and didn't speak for almost 3 years. When I got out of the service, I moved back to Kentucky and saw my mother for the first time. We had dinner and I went to spend the night with her in Lexington where she lived. The last thing I told her before I left her house was "I love you mom" and promised to come visit again in a couple of weeks after I got settled in. I didn't have a phone at that time so my aunt had to come and tell me that she had passed away less than 2 weeks after I said those words. You just never know when the words you say to another may be the last you ever say to them. Make the words count...
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